maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
