Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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