pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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