Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
worst night to have a conscience
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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