I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
