a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
