I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
