I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
What changed your mind?
Being sober
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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