My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
