How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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