Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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