I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
