went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize