Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
