we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
