Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize