It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize