tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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