How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Randomize
