I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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