My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Randomize
