he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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