Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
