Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
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