Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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