is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
