I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Randomize