Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
