You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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