Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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