My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
I think my vagina is haunted
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Randomize
