idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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