those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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