I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
