he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
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