The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
