3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
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