she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
They took my balls.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
this is an emotional support booty call
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
