is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
he puts the penis in happiness.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Randomize
