I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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