My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Randomize
