If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
The ass gains better be worth it
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
