Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize