So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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