shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
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