did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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