i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize