The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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