yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize
