a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
